A bumble bee was chasing a rabbit. Finally the
bee turned around and flew away. Why?
The rabbit had two b's
already.
Baby Rabbit: Mommy, where did I come
from?
Mother Rabbit: I'll tell you when you're older.
Baby Rabbit:
Oh, Mommy, please, tell me now.
Mother Rabbit: If you must know, you
were pulled from a magician's
hat.
Did you hear about the rabbit who got a job in a
watch factory?
Alike did was stand around making faces.
Did you hear about the egg
laden rabbit who
jumps off bridges?
He's the Easter Bungee!
Did you hear about the pub owner who raised
a baby rabbit?
It was an inn-grown hare!
Did you hear about the rich rabbit?
He was a
millionhare!
How can you tell which rabbits are the oldest
in a group?
Look for gray hares.
How did the close race between the rabbit and
the tortoise end?
It was won by a hare!
How did the rabbit become a wrestling
champion?
It had a lot of hare pins!
How do rabbits get to work?
By rabbit
transit!
How do you know when there's a rabbit in your
bed?
You can smell the carrots on his breath.
How do you know when you're
eating rabbit
stew?
When it has hares in it.
How do you make a rabbit fast?
Don't feed
it.
How do you make a rabbit stew?
Keep it
waiting.
How far can a rabbit run into the woods?
Halfway. After that she's running out of the woods.
How is a rabbit like a plum?
They're both
purple, except for the rabbit.
Lara Rabbit: Do you
think that's Sophie's
natural color?
Zara Rabbit: Only her hare dresser knows for
sure.
May I buy half a
rabbit?
No, we don't
split hares!
My friend is nuts. He thinks he's Bugs
Bunny. But I'm positive he isn't.
How do you know he isn't?
Because I am.
Rabbit: Are you sure this bottle of special
carrot
juice will cure me?
Doctor: Absolutely. No rabbit ever came
back for another.
Rabbit: I got kicked out of my cage for not
paying the rent. My wife walked out and took our twenty-nine bunnies
with
her. I'm all out of carrots. What should I do?
Friend:
Don't worry; be hoppy!
Waiter, what is this hare doing in my
salad?
I believe he's eating your lettuce.
What are four hundred rabbits
hopping
backwards?
A receding hare line.
What book did the rabbit take on vacation?
One with a hoppy ending.
What did the bunny say when he only had
thistles to eat?
Thistle have to do!
What did the bunny want to do when he grew
up?
Join the Hare Force.
What did the customer say to the pet shop
assistant after buying a bunny?
Rabbit up nicely, it's a gift!
What did the magician say when he
made his
rabbit disappear?
Hare today, gone tomorrow.
What did the naughty rabbit leave for
Easter?
Deviled eggs!
What did the rabbit bride get on her wedding
day?
A forty-carrot wedding ring.
What do rabbits put in their
computers?
Hoppy disks!
What do you call a chocolate Easter bunny that
was out
in the sun too long?
A runny bunny.
What do you call a rabbit who is real cool?
A hip hopper.
What do you call a rabbit with fleas?
Bugs
Bunny.
What do you call a rabbit with no clothes on?
A bare hare.
What do you call a dumb bunny?
A hare
brain.
What do you call a man with a rabbit up his
jumper ?
Warren !
What do you call a mobile homes for
rabbits?
Wheelburrows!
What do you call a rabbit that plays with
foxes?
A dumb bunny.
What do you call a rabbit who tells jokes?
A funny bunny
What do you call a rabbit who works in a
bakery?
A yeaster bunny!
What do you call an affectionate rabbit?
A
tender, loving hare.
What do you call an easy-going rabbit?
Hoppy-go-lucky.
What do you call an operation on a rabbit?
A hare-cut.
What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on
someone's
forehead?
Unsightly facial hare!
What do you call an unusual rabbit?
A rare
hare.
What do you call it when one rabbit challenges
another
rabbit to hop across a forty-yard canyon?
A hare
dare.
What do you call the everyday routines of
rabbits?
Rabbits habits.
What do you get when you cross a bumble bee
with a
rabbit?
A honey bunny.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a
leek?
A bunion.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with a
spider?
A harenet.
What do you get when you cross a bunny with an
orange?
A pip squeak.
What do you get when you cross a frog and a
rabbit?
A rabbit that says, "Ribbit."
What do you get when you cross a
rabbit
with a boy scout?
A boyscout who helps little old ladies hop across
the street.
What do
you get when you cross a rabbit
with a millionaire?
A bunny with money.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with an
elephant?
An elephant who never forgets to eat his carrots.
What do you get
when you cross a rabbit
with strawberry soda?
A berry bubbly bunny.
What do you get when you pour hot water down a
rabbit hole?
A Hot Cross bunny.
What does a bunny use when it goes
fishing?
A harenet.
What is the difference between a crazy bunny
and a
counterfeit banknote?
One is bad money and the other is a
mad bunny!
What job do rabbits at hotels have?
Bellhop.
What kind of cars do rabbits drive?
Hop
rods.
What must a policeman have before searching a
rabbits'
home?
A search warren!
What should a rabbit use to keep his fur neat?
A harebrush.
What weighs 35 tons, has four fuzzy ears and is
80
million years old?
Two rabbits riding a brontosaurus.
What's a rabbits' favorite book?
Hop on
Pop.
What's a rabbits' favorite dance?
The
bunny hop.
What's a rabbits' favorite movie?
Rabbits
of the Lost Ark.
What's a rabbits' favorite
musical?
Hare.
What's a rabbits' favorite song?
"Hoppy
Birthday to You."
What's a rabbits' favorite TV show?
Hoppy
Days.
What's a rabbits' favourite car?
Any make,
just as long it's a hutchback!
What's the best way to
catch a unique
rabbit?
Unique up on him
What's the fastest way to send a rabbit?
Haremail.
When do rabbits have buck teeth?
When their
parents won't get them braces.
Where do rabbits go after their wedding?
On
their bunnymoon.
When does a rabbit go exactly as fast as a
train?
When it's on the train.
Where do rabbits settle their legal
disputes?
In a pellet court!
Which rabbit is a famous comedian?
Bob
Hop.
Which rabbit stole from the rich to give to the
poor?
Rabbit Hood.
Which rabbit was a famous female aviator?
Amelia Harehart.
Which rabbit was in Western movies?
Hopalong Cassidy.
Which rabbits were famous bank robbers?
Bunny and Clyde.
Why are rabbits like calculators?
They both
multiply a lot.
Why are rabbits never gold?
How would you
tell them apart from goldfish?
Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter?
He didn't have the hare fare.
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on
his
head?
Because from a distance they looked like hares!
Why did the rabbit
run out of the fast-food
restaurant?
He thought he heard someone order a quarter pounder on
a toasted
bunny.
Why did the rabbit have trouble
hopping?
Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck!
Why did
the rabbits go on strike?
They
wanted a better celery!
Why do rabbits go to the beauty parlor?
For
hare care.
Why is a bunny the luckiest animal in the
world?
It has 4 rabbits' feet.
What do you get if you pour boiling water
down rabbit holes?
Hot, cross bunnies !
Q. Did you hear the Energizer Bunny Was
Arrested? R. Charged With Battery!
Q: What do you get when you cross a perm
with a rabbit?
A: Curly hare.
Two Rabbits are running from a group of foxes.
They hide in a pile of hay, one rabbit says to the other one "ok we
can run for it or we can stay here and out number them. And the
other
rabbit says, "were going to run for it you idiot I'm your
brother.
A
lady opened her refrigerator and saw a
rabbit sitting on one of the
shelves,
"What are you doing in
there?" she asked.
The rabbit replied, "This is a Westinghouse, isn't
it?"
The lady confirmed, "Yes." "Well," the rabbit said, "I'm
westing."
